Tyler McVicker

It has been a few hours since I last had Chipotle, which made me very gassy. Now that I've had my Chipotle, I feel like I need to take a shit.

(VNN Intro)

Now on my way of processing through the intro, I may or may not have shit myself and have diarrhea all over my floor because I did not go to use the bathroom when I had the Chipotle shits. Now this was because I needed to get an email from Gabe Newell telling me that Half-Life 3 was confirmed. Now I did not get that email, but I believe within the next 10 years I will get an email from Gaben telling me to either stop it with all of the speculation or he's going to tell me that Half-Life 3 is confirmed. Now obviously I have talked to Eric Smith of Valve who has told me "Please stop calling my house and harassing my family." Now obviously he's just a lying piece of shit and I-I-I know that Half-Life is coming out soon, so y-you know, y-y-you guys should obviously believe me. Uh, god dija-Did I tell you about uh, uh Creators.TF? Have I told you about Creators.TF recently? Creators.TF is a where you can get a bunch of brand new TF2 updates from the community, 'cause obviously I know that Team Fortress 2 is not gonna get another update for the next 10 years, because I know everything. I'm Tyler McVicker, this is Valve News Network, thanks for watching, adios.